Degrassi...the next generation

I took my niece Bess to the arcade and bowling yesterday, she brought her boyfriend. My niece is 8. Yes, my 8 year old niece has a boyfriend, his name is Jace. Jace used all the tokens he won at the arcade to get Bess a ring; a big, plastic, shiny ring. They hold hands and it’s all so cute…until I realize that

a)       I couldn’t get Kermit to put a ring on it, I will probably never get a ring, and I will sing Single Ladies all the way to the alter of my best friends weddings

b)       I am single…with no prospects of that changing, which is fine, because I enjoy being single. But any current prospects would just end in me settling again. Except for one guy, maybe. A guy not even you, my readers, know about.

c)       Although I happily content being single my current love life is like a whole season of an after school special of Degrassi.

So while Bess basks in her first love I am reminded that my relationships have all failed and it all seems in the tragic way that I came up short, I was just not what they wanted. I am not concerned with my failed relationships, I’ve become a better person because of them, I am happy being single and taking time for me but it doesn’t change the fact that I currently have a fucking crush on a guy I haven’t even had the nerve to write about. I have a middle school, Justin Bieber style, ask my parents if I can go out after dark, crush…and it needs to go away now.

 Welcome to my after school special kids, grab a seat, popcorn will be handed out right before the climax of this love story.

The climax where this man took  one of your friends on not one but two dates…then kissed you.

No no…not that climax…silly. That’s just the start of episode one

The climax where he told you that he planned on taking a trip in the next couple months to clear his head because he going through some kind of crisis.

Nope still not the climax

The climax where he makes you climax?

Well...that's a climax just not the kind I am talking about. Jesus.

You mean the climax where Skipper walked into his brother’s house to find you hanging out with his brother, and it was very obvious that you had just spent the night? Then Skipper stormed out of the house while yelling something at said brother?

Maybe? I guess we’ll see because this after school special isn’t over yet…I mean it should be. I should have got up and left after he kissed me, that’s what a good person would have done. But I didn’t. I wouldn’t have replied to his messages after he kissed me…but I did…I shouldn’t have let him make me laugh or feel special or happy or content because that’s really the beginning of the end for me and now I am left sheer confusion. I mean I just want some one who wants to hang out all the time, thinks I am awesome and beautiful and tells me so and wants to have sex with me and only me. Don’t mistake that for a relationship. Relationships turn into routine, they turn into fights, and they turn into work. I just want some thing fun and easy going, some thing that is just simple…this isn’t simple…I realize that…but when I am with him it feels easy. He makes it feel simple.

But being a girl I needed validation that he felt the same way I do so I asked the stupid question even though every thing inside me screamed don’t do; I asked him how he felt, if this was going any where or if it’s just what it is now. He said he liked me, but it was complicated, no, complex. I replied, Dana and Skipper? He just said ya. I don’t even know why I asked, I had been saying that since the start that I couldn’t exactly go to Sunday dinner with his family and sit down between the two brothers. I couldn’t give his dad a high five for raising not one but two sons who rock in bed.  I couldn’t answer the question how did you two meet; oh he was dating my friend! I don’t know what I was expecting; I don’t even know what I want. Maybe I need to learn to be content and go with the flow and not over analyze every thing.

I am content with this delicious croissant that is filled with chocolate and whip cream and strawberries. I am very content with that.