I'm sorry I mentioned it

Jenna and I took a road trip to go get bridal lingerie last week, on our way back she asked me that if enough time passed would I consider getting back together with Kermit. She pointed out how well we worked together for so long, and how much I cared for him and how bad dating has been for me since him, really it's been horrible. After I was done hysterically laughing and then crying I replied with no, more like fuck no but you get what I am sayin. Kermit and I really tried to make a friendship work after our breakup, I really wanted a friendship to work, there was just one problem, somewhere between the end of our relationship and now he has turned into a complete douche bag. Have you ever tried to be friends with a complete douche bag? It’s hard isn’t it.

 Which leads me to last Friday, after having possibly the most crap filled week I received news that an old co-worker died. I worked with him when I worked with Kermit so I thought I would let Kermit know, in case you know, he decided to stop being an arrogant prick, turns out he hasn't so that's great.

 

 You know the saying though, once an arrogant prick, always an arrogant. He asked how I was doing, I said absolutely horrible, my week is shit, I got the boot for my “roommates” and there has been a pile of stress lately. Wrong thing to say, you know what you say when your ex boyfriend asks how you are doing? You say good. And you run. Otherwise you get some not needed pep talk about how you need to look at things positively and you are just whiny. Great. Have you been around lately? No, it's been shit, there isn't a whole lot to be positive about. Thanks for adding to my great week, you sure know how to make a girl feel better. I texted back and say, alright have a nice day this is why we don’t talk anymore. He texted me my give-a-fuck meter is right out so I left it.

 

Fast forward to Saturday night when I am having drinks at Melvins, (don't ask) I get a text from Mike

 

"Kermit asked me for your number, which is weird because I didn't give him mine"

 

"well...he probably got it on a bathroom stall. He has my number though, I just talked to him Friday."

 

That's weird right? Why, do not text my friends, you lost those in the divorce, you got all the furniture, I got my friends. Maybe if you weren't an arrogant prick you could have your own, as it stands, they are mine, back off.

 When I first met Kermit he was the nicest, most understanding guy I had ever met, that is what I liked about him, he listened and he cared, over time that person faded, since breaking up that person has flown to never ever land never to be seen again and this new cocky jackass has stepped in to take his place. Let me tell you a secret folks, he is not all that and a bag of potatoes chips, I dated the guy I know, he’s wasn’t some amazing catch that I stumbled on and luckily kept.  No, he was weird and dorky but he cared about people. You know what has changed since we’ve broke up? The amount on his pay cheques. That does not give a person reason to turn into an egotistical dickhead yet somehow it always seems to have that affect.

 So that friendship has dissolved, so I retract any statement that I have previously made that ex’s can be friends, they can’t, they can be civil.